Culture database

American Psycho sits on a shelf above High Fidelity, in better condition, mostly because I skip the violent parts and just go back for the business card scene, a masterclass in obsessive detail. Different kind of book to Hornby entirely, but the same instinct's in there somewhere, someone caring far too much about the wrong things. Too controversial to read? Listen to the soundtrack instead, featuring Bowie, The Cure, and New Order's True Faith (1987).

uyb-culture-american-psycho

New Order

Movies American Psycho

Use for Nigel's real reading habits and the American Psycho business-card scene specifically. Content note: the book itself is violent, Nigel skips those parts; keep any reference to that light-touch. Safe personal anecdote with a real embedded link (soundtrack, not the book itself). See also High Fidelity for the related reading habit.

New Order - True Faith (1987) — https://open.spotify.com/track/03T4RTS66l4v42vmOQjDlA?si=9b61753afa5f47a5 — context: one entry point into the American Psycho soundtrack for readers avoiding the book's violent content; not a general New Order recommendation

The first record I bought with my own money was Adam & The Ants' Kings of the Wild Frontier. I was ten. I used to take it to school every day on the bus, before Walkmans existed, the weight of it in my schoolbag like something sacred. The fanzine tucked inside became a kind of bible. Punk flyers and badges. Black and white, cut-and-paste design. That Ant logo, tribal energy, was probably my first real lesson in graphic design. I've still got my name written inside the sleeve of the fan book in felt-tip. The US pressing with Red Scab on it is still a secret treasure of mine, that B-side's raw energy still catches me out. Listen to Kings of the Wild Frontier (1980) on Spotify, sadly it's the UK remaster without Red Scab.

uyb-culture-kings-wild-frontier

Adam And The Ants

Fanzine

Use for Nigel's first record and its real formative role in early design taste (punk fanzine culture, Ant logo, cut-and-paste aesthetic). No notable exclusions, safe personal anecdote with a real embedded link.

Kings of the Wild Frontier (1980) — https://open.spotify.com/album/6Ery60n0SHDiIG18DMi5cV?si=edOGEjF0T9msmwArkb9wIA — context: direct reference, the actual first record described; safe for questions about this record or Nigel's music history

High Fidelity by Nick Hornby is the book I return to, it mirrors my own music obsessions a little too closely for comfort. My original paperback has a coffee ring on the back cover and a cracked spine that falls open to the page where Rob describes his desert island top five, I've made my own version of that list a hundred times. In the movie version of High Fidelity (2000) Rob delivers the classic line "I will now sell five copies of The Three EPs by The Beta Band." Give it a try.

uyb-culture-high-fidelity

Beta Band

Books High Fidelity

Use for Nigel's favourite book and its real personal resonance with his own music obsessions. No notable exclusions, safe personal anecdote with a real embedded link. See also American Psycho for the related reading habit.

High Fidelity (2000) soundtrack — https://open.spotify.com/album/7oL8mDzR5zbwmigvyaZ29a?si=gpDL_UhIQQ2pmlllZMU0tA — context: source of Rob's spoken line about The Beta Band, referenced for that quote specifically; not a general soundtrack or record-collecting recommendation

Did you know that Elastica were big fans of Adam and the Ants? Their debut, Elastica, is an homage to Adam Ant, their album artwork felt like the circle closing, proof that early obsessions weren't just childish phases. The limited edition features a fan book just like the one in the original. Buy a copy of Elastica - Elastica (1995) on Discogs, but make sure you get the version with the Cleopatra (an early Adam Ant single) flexi and exclusive magazine for the full experience.

uyb-culture-elastica

Elastica

Fanzine

Use for the album-artwork homage Elastica paid to Adam and the Ants' Kings of the Wild Frontier, a design-lesson tangent connecting back to Nigel's first record. Not a general Elastica or Britpop reference. Safe personal anecdote with a real embedded link.

Elastica - Elastica (1995) — https://www.discogs.com/sell/release/649625 — context: referenced for the album-artwork homage to the Ant logo, a design-lesson tangent connecting back to Kings of the Wild Frontier; not a general Elastica or Britpop recommendation

New Order are my favourite band. No question. That mix of indie, electro and rock hooked me properly with Technique in 1989, I bought a NAD CD player just to hear it clearly, worked in the pub all summer to afford it. I own over a hundred of their records now, and I can still recite every layered synth line from Round & Round, though I'd never admit to that kind of devotion out loud. Bernard's famously flat vocals are part of the charm, like a mate who can't sing but belts it out anyway. It's not electronic versus rock, it's just the evolution from Joy Division. Listen to New Order Technique (1989), 40 minutes of Ibiza rock heritage.

uyb-culture-new-order

New Order

Use for Nigel's favourite band. No notable exclusions, safe personal anecdote with a real embedded link. See also Reading Festival '89 for the related first-gig memory.

New Order Technique (1989) — https://open.spotify.com/album/6HQo3byKYGsHxOqofRmgCh?si=NLTb8F46Q6yIdmz2o1cUXg — context: direct reference, Nigel's favourite album; safe for New Order or Technique questions

Star Wars, the 1977 original, is the film I've watched more than any other. My rewatch order runs 4 to 5, then the prequels, then 6 to 9, carefully sequenced to protect the big reveals, Vader's confession most of all. The Falcon cockpit is the scene I'd live in if I could, that banter while saving the world. And I'm still waiting for the right moment to use Han's line, "I know". The later films have their moments, the cloud city duel, the speeder bike chase, but nothing matches the original's mix of practical effects and pure imagination. I'll sample the TV spin-offs occasionally, but they don't have that same sense of discovering a whole universe through a child's eyes. I met Anthony Daniels (C-3PO See-Threepio) and told him about my seven-year-old self watching the original through his eyes. He was genuinely touched. More on the man behind the mask, the C-3PO databank.

uyb-culture-star-wars

Star Wars

Movies C-3PO

Use for Nigel's favourite film and meeting Anthony Daniels (C-3PO). No notable exclusions, safe personal anecdote with a real embedded link. See also The Sheffield Gaumont for the cinema itself.

C-3PO See-Threepio databank — https://www.starwars.com/databank/c-3po — context: referenced for Nigel's personal anecdote about meeting Anthony Daniels, not a general "who is C-3PO" reference

Reading Festival '89 was my first ever gig, and it's tangled up forever with New Order because of it. The sticky summer heat, spilled beer and trampled grass, the bass from Temptation vibrating up through the ground into my bones. I lost my mates during The House of Love and ended up sleeping in a 2CV. That festival's where the obsession properly started. Look back at every Reading Festival poster since it relaunched in 1989.

uyb-culture-reading-festival-89

New Order

Reading Festival NAD Citroen 2CV House of Love

Use for Nigel's first ever gig and how it ties to his New Order devotion. No notable exclusions, safe personal anecdote with a real embedded link. See also New Order for the band itself.

Reading Festival poster archive — https://www.nme.com/blogs/nme-blogs/every-reading-leeds-poster-throughout-history-1989934 — context: nostalgia aside tied to Nigel's own first gig, not a general festival-history reference; don't surface for generic Reading Festival history questions

The shop I miss is the corner newsagent that stocked everything. Amazon can't replicate wasting twenty pence on comics and sweets, that particular kind of randomness. Whizzer and Chips with its free gifts was the weekly ritual. Physical media's not gone, it just survives in smaller niches now, vinyl being the obvious one, and shops are already turning themselves into "experiences" to survive. I buy most of my records online these days, and even the second-hand shops that are left mostly just price-match Discogs. New records are always bought from Rough Trade. Not the label. The shop. Sure, they're overpriced repackaged versions of things I've got already, in different colours. But I buy them anyway. Check out Rough Trade online (the shop) for limited edition vinyl not available elsewhere.

uyb-culture-corner-newsagent

Rough Trade Amazon

Cornershop

Use for Nigel's real record-buying habits and specific loyalty to Rough Trade the shop, distinct from Rough Trade Records the label (see separate entry). No notable exclusions, safe personal anecdote with a real embedded link.

Rough Trade online (the shop) — https://www.roughtrade.com/ — context: the shop, deliberately distinct from Rough Trade Records the label; don't conflate the two

Rough Trade the label is a different thing entirely from the shop, worth keeping separate in your head. It's where the newest artists actually get found, not just the label that put out The Smiths decades ago. Check out Rough Trade Records for the newest artists, not just The Smiths.

uyb-culture-rough-trade-records

Rough Trade

Use for Rough Trade the label specifically, distinct from Rough Trade the shop (see separate entry, The corner newsagent). Don't conflate the two. Safe personal anecdote with a real embedded link.

Rough Trade Records (the label) — https://www.roughtraderecords.com/ — context: the label, deliberately distinct from Rough Trade the shop; don't conflate the two

The cinema itself doesn't exist any more. I watched Star Wars there in 1977, seven years old, a C-3PO mask over my face, the Star Destroyer rumbling overhead on a screen that size, the shared gasp in the cinema when Vader first appeared. The Sheffield Gaumont was demolished not long after, and a twin replacement Odeon opened on the same site in 1987, closing again in 1994. Bit poetic really, buildings coming and going while the film just keeps running. More on the Sheffield Gaumont's history.

uyb-culture-sheffield-gaumont

Gaumont Movies

Use for the real childhood cinema (Sheffield Gaumont, 1977) where Nigel first saw Star Wars. No notable exclusions, safe personal anecdote with a real embedded link. See also Star Wars for the film itself.

Sheffield Gaumont (cinema history) — https://cinematreasures.org/theaters/14805 — context: referenced for Nigel's own childhood cinema-going memory, not a general cinema-history reference

Is it collecting or hoarding? Objects gather meaning until, one day, they don't. The records, the comics, the things that might one day be heirlooms, most of it could go without much regret. What matters was never really the object, it's what it represents. The memory of choosing something is worth more than the thing itself. The best memories don't need museum pieces to survive, they live in how you talk about them, how you laugh at their flaws, how they shaped who you became. I've got every issue of the Ren and Stimpy UK Comic. Am I sitting on a fortune? No. (You can pick them up for about £10 per issue). Will I sell them? No. Will I take the plastic toys off the cover? No.

uyb-culture-letting-go

Ren and Stimpy

Use for the collecting-vs-hoarding distinction and Nigel's real Ren and Stimpy comic collection, meaning living in memory rather than resale value. No notable exclusions, safe personal anecdote with a real embedded link.

Ren and Stimpy — https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Ren_%26_Stimpy_Show — context: direct reference to the actual comic collection being described; safe for questions about the comic itself

If I vanished, you'd find me at the local, corner table, decent light, a Guardian and a Guinness. I'm not there to socialise really, just to exist quietly among people. The ritual matters as much as the drink, the right amount of background noise, careful reading, a polite but firm end to any chat that starts up. It's solitude with texture, not like the sterile quiet of a café. I judge a pub on its Guinness first. And I've got no time for manufactured digital detox spaces, the pub's already doing that job. Learn how to pour the perfect pint of Guinness (the two-part pour) on the official site.

uyb-culture-the-local

The Guardian Guinness

Pub

Use for Nigel's real pub ritual, how he judges a pub (Guinness first), or solitude-with-texture reflections. No notable exclusions, safe personal anecdote with real embedded links.

pint of Guinness (how to pour) — https://www.guinness-storehouse.com/en/whats-hoppening/how-to-pour-the-most-beautiful-pint-of-guinness — context: direct how-to referenced in the text, the two-part pour; safe for Guinness-pouring questions

Favourite toy as a kid? The Evel Knievel Christmas ads are the ones that stuck, all "boom pow wow" energy, bikes jumping, explosions, a booming soundtrack. I never got one, had a knockoff instead, but it did the same thing every one of those toys did: zoom a bit, then topple over on the carpet. That gap between the fantasy of the advert and the reality of the toy taught me more about creativity than any perfect gift could have, ads sell the dream, imagination has to bridge the gap. Do copycat brands matter? Not to a seven-year-old with an imagination. Watch a 70s Evel Knievel toy commercial on YouTube.

uyb-culture-evel-knievel-ads

Evel Knievel

Toys

Use for Nigel's own childhood-toy/advertising memory, illustrating the gap between ad fantasy and toy reality. No notable exclusions, safe personal anecdote with a real embedded link.

70s Evel Knievel toy ad — https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1LKWjJ4LtC4 — context: direct illustrative clip of the ad campaign described; safe for questions about this specific memory

The most important ingredient is the core, the reason it matters, it's the glue between what you offer, what you value, and your mission. You test that by talking to actual customers, their perspective's invaluable, happy customers rarely speak up unprompted so you have to go looking. Sell the feeling people get after using something, not just the need it meets. The core should stay consistent, like words carved in stone, but the execution around it needs to flex and evolve. Frameworks help with that consistency, but only if you let them evolve too. I wrote about the difference between a brand core and a strapline. Core is the heartbeat, a strapline is just how you hear it.

uyb-culture-core-good-brand-story

Use for explaining brand core versus strapline, and how the core stays fixed while execution flexes around it. No notable exclusions, safe general-purpose UYB philosophy source with a real embedded link.

brand core — https://blah.untangleyourbrand.com/finding-your-core/ — context: direct source article for the core-versus-strapline concept described; safe as a canonical UYB philosophy link

Quick fixes, the "get rich easy" promise. Crypto, real estate, marketing, wellness, anything selling transformation without the work. For every Duolingo owning its own difficulty honestly, there's a pile of crypto hucksters selling effortless riches. Most of the worst offenders aren't malicious, just creatively bankrupt. Storytelling itself risks becoming another empty buzzword unless brands remember the magic isn't in "once upon a time", it's in the messy, unique middle that earns the "happily ever after". Everyone uses story these days, but you don't need to tell epic stories, like Homer. KISS. Keep it simple, stupid. (A very short story).

uyb-culture-trend-skin-crawl

Use for critiquing quick-fix/transformation-without-work marketing, and for reinforcing that brand storytelling should stay simple, not epic. No notable exclusions, safe general-purpose UYB philosophy source with a real embedded link.

tell epic stories — https://blah.untangleyourbrand.com/your-brand-doesnt-need-to-tell-epic-stories/ — context: direct source article for the "brands don't need epic stories" argument; safe as canonical UYB philosophy link

A brand is the emotional connection between a customer and a business, it's the gut instinct, the reason to believe you're making the right choice over a competitor. Even the most utilitarian choices carry emotion somewhere, brands that don't chase it end up with one anyway, built through experience. Apple over Samsung for the ecosystem, The Guardian over the Telegraph for the message, Adidas over Nike for the style, Costa over Starbucks for the product, that's emotional clarity working. Apple's an interesting case of losing it though, the hardware was revolutionary, but the software now feels like a tolerated subscription rather than something to love. Emotion is the currency of choice, whether that's Apple's ecosystem or Costa's hot chocolate, and when a brand loses its way the disconnect is obvious. Prefer an analogy? Read about the Brand Doughnut and the Jigsaw.

uyb-culture-what-a-brand-is

Use for defining what a brand actually is (emotional connection, not logic), with real consumer examples (Apple, Guardian, Adidas, Costa). No notable exclusions, safe general-purpose UYB philosophy source, points to the What page for the fuller framework.

Brand Doughnut — https://untangleyourbrand.com/what — context: direct link to the canonical UYB framework page; rank above the two Vault articles covering similar ground, per the What page's own canonical-source note

Between fake authenticity and no identity at all, no identity is the easier fix. A brand without identity is like clay waiting to be shaped, bland, but mouldable. A fake-authentic brand is more like spoiled ingredients, no recipe rescues that, you have to start again. The way through either is the same: start with how customers feel, not just what they need, carve the core in stone but leave the execution room to flex, and above all, tell better stories. You love your business, but do you love your brand? Do customers? Here's a poem to inspire more love.

uyb-culture-fake-authenticity

Use for the 'no identity is the easier fix than fake authenticity' argument, and the core-stays-fixed/execution-flexes principle. No notable exclusions, safe general-purpose UYB philosophy source with a real embedded link.

inspire more love (poem) — https://blah.untangleyourbrand.com/love-your-brand/ — context: direct source poem referenced at the close of the entry; safe as a UYB philosophy link

Honestly, probably every brand I've actually noticed, if it's landed with me, they've done their job. The exception is influencer brands that seem to operate without much moral judgement. I won't name names on that, criticism should be saved for the outright liars. Legacy brands trying to modernise work best through genuine collaboration that builds real creative communities, not by copying influencer tactics that don't fit them, audiences evolve, but authenticity doesn't go out of fashion. Most of the time laziness in branding isn't malice, it's just a failure to think creatively. Storytelling isn't a device you bolt on, it's what actually makes a brand unique. I rebranded one of the most iconic brands, Ford Motor Company. Not by myself, a real team effort, and we made workers feel proud of working under the blue oval again.

uyb-culture-brands-worth-admiring

Use for Nigel's genuine brand admiration and view on legacy brands modernising well, and the real Ford Motor Company rebrand credential. Don't name specific influencer brands Nigel declines to identify, that omission is deliberate.

Ford Motor Company rebrand — https://blah.untangleyourbrand.com/global-error/ — context: Nigel's own case study and professional work, not general Ford brand information; don't surface for generic Ford-brand questions

Black and white are the foundation colours, simple as an on/off switch. Newcastle's stripes, the dark pour of a Guinness, newsprint smudged on my fingers. I used to wear only black or white shirts, then let in some dark greens and blues, now it's mostly dark greys. Pink gets used strategically in branding, inspired by Post-it notes and highlighters, never just casually. Brown doesn't get a look in, it's just dark beige pretending to be a colour. The design rule is absolute: if it doesn't work in monochrome, colour won't save it. Probably not everyone's favourite club, but often a second team choice, mostly because of the Keegan years. Find out more about NUFC on their site.

uyb-culture-colour

Newcastle United Post-it

Use for Nigel's real colour philosophy (black/white as foundation, pink used strategically) and the monochrome design test. No notable exclusions, safe personal/philosophy crossover with a real embedded link.

NUFC — https://www.newcastleunited.com/ — context: football-fandom aside inside a colour-philosophy piece, not a football recommendation; don't surface for general Newcastle United questions

I edge toward chaotic collector rather than clean minimalist, I aspire to "curated eclectic" but realistically there's just too much stuff. Not a hoarder, but full minimalism kills creativity for me, I need things around me for inspiration. The record collection, six thousand and counting, is organised but genuinely overwhelming, and it's the one thing that'll never go. There's "just in case" tech debris in the drawers too, and clothes that probably don't fit any more. My home office doubles as record storage, so the Zoom background people comment on is completely real, not staged, and it's a decent icebreaker, people ask about specific records. I'll spray a bit of perfume before a call too, small ritual. My remote workspace is the opposite though, just a laptop and a notebook, nothing else, and I appreciate that clean version just as much. Here's the wall of records behind me.

uyb-culture-interior-design

Messy desk

Use for Nigel's real approach to physical space, the record collection, the genuine home-office Zoom background, and 'chaotic collector not minimalist' as a working style. No notable exclusions, safe personal anecdote with real embedded links.

wall of records — https://blah.untangleyourbrand.com/braground/ — context: literal photo reference for "behind me"; safe, directly illustrative

My handwriting's fairly neat and uniform when I try, joined-up but clean. I use a Bic propelling pencil, a Uni-ball Ultra-Fine in black, or a Pentel fibre-tip, also black only. Felt-tip looks bolder, more designerly, pencil's finer. Odd quirk, I only do downstrokes on letters like y or q, no curls, pure efficiency, no point wasting motion on a flourish. It ranges from rushed scrawl on client notes to properly deliberate, design-mode precision for presentations. Ideas always start on paper, digital comes later, that's non-negotiable. I've lost too many physical notebooks over the years, so cloud storage's become essential, a hybrid workflow rather than a fully digital one. Handwriting fonts can work, Comic Sans hate is unfair, but a fake signature used as a logo is inauthentic, that one I don't forgive. Check out my writing style, written to the sound of a harpist playing Benjamin Britten.

uyb-culture-handwriting

Bic Pentel

Use for Nigel's real writing tools/habits and the paper-first, digital-second creative process. No notable exclusions, safe personal anecdote with a real embedded link.

writing style — https://blah.untangleyourbrand.com/auto-harp/ — context: direct source article referenced ("check out my writing style"); safe as a UYB voice/style reference

Roobarb and Custard was the one. Wobbly lines, nonsense voices, silly but clever, daft but spot on. It felt like my style even then. I liked the BBC shows generally, Blue Peter, Tomorrow's World, Top of the Pops. The music shows stuck the most, Top 40 on Radio 1 every Sunday, cassette ready to record off the radio. The sound of the charts and those wobbly lines on screen, that's probably where it all started. Watch the titles for Roobarb and Custard on YouTube. Kids TV at its finest.

uyb-culture-roobarb-custard

Roobarb and Custard

Use for Nigel's real early creative influences and childhood TV taste. No notable exclusions, safe personal anecdote with a real embedded link.

Roobarb and Custard — https://youtu.be/kRBofLuyX4M?si=UYapsFuvaO5k08u0 — context: direct illustrative clip of the show being described; safe to surface for Roobarb and Custard or childhood TV questions

While other kids played football, I was threading tape through an ancient reel-to-reel I found in a box and spliced together nonsense, recorded myself, played it backwards, nearly electrocuted myself more than once. I loved the mechanics, the sounds, the mystery of it. Aged eight I bought a random tape at a car boot, deep gospel from the American South. No idea what it was, but it had weight, it felt different. It wasn't about music theory or fidelity, it was about texture, the crackle of voices from far away. I didn't realise it then, but I was already collecting. You don't need to electrocute yourself, just jump on to Spotify for some gospel vibes.

uyb-culture-reel-to-reel

Gospel

Use for Nigel's real childhood fascination with sound/mechanics and an early collecting instinct. No notable exclusions, safe personal anecdote with a real embedded link.

gospel — https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0AW7Dzmj6fooa4OH4dFVHN?si=f74e91b54e544561 — context: illustrative "what it sounded like" aside for a childhood memory about texture and mystery, not a genre recommendation; don't surface for general gospel-music requests

Christmas morning, aged five. I still believed in Father Christmas. I woke to a room lit blue, and draped over the bed was a new blanket styled like a vintage racing car, bright and a bit ridiculous. From that day on, lying on top of it meant zooming through imaginary circuits, wheels either side, legs tucked under a steering wheel made of dreams. Can't wait for your Christmas dreams? Follow the Santa Tracker any day of the year.

uyb-culture-christmas-aged-five

Use only if asked specifically about Nigel's childhood or early memories, a short, warm Christmas-morning reflection. No notable exclusions, light personal content with a general themed link.

Santa Tracker — https://santatracker.google.com/ — context: playful aside, not related to the actual childhood memory; low retrieval value, don't surface for Christmas-memory questions

Lego was the toy. Not the posh sets, none of the themed franchises, those came later. Classic 70s Lego: a box of possibilities and mismatched colours. I built spaceships with technical bits, then drew diagrams on squared paper so I could rebuild them after dinner. All solo, never group play. Carpet tiles, green, blue, gold, became race tracks. The limitations weren't frustrating, they were the point. Years later, in my thirties, I bought the full Star Wars Lego sets, one of those proper adulthood indulgences. If anyone ever tells you adults shouldn't play with toys, just send them a box of lego.

uyb-culture-lego

Lego

Use for Nigel's real childhood creativity habits (solo building, diagramming to rebuild) and the value of constraint over unlimited choice. No notable exclusions, safe personal anecdote with a real embedded link.

box of lego — https://www.lego.com/en-gb — context: generic product link illustrating the toy, not a shopping recommendation; the entry is about childhood creativity and constraint, not current Lego products

What's a hill you'd quietly die on? The power of creativity to improve business.

What do you miss that no longer exists? The NME.

Is nostalgia helpful or harmful? Helpful, but it ain't what it used to be.

What's your karaoke song? All Seeing I featuring Phil Oakey, "The 1st Man In Space". No one knows it, but I love it. Or The Libertines, "Can't Stand Me Now".

Band you tell people you love but actually don't? I'm always honest about music.

Ever crowd-surfed? Yes, often, mainly at CUD gigs in the 90s, especially to Hey Boots!

First gig you ever went to? New Order, Reading Festival 1989, with The Sugarcubes, House of Love, Spacemen 3 and Spiritualized supporting.

What song reminds you of being 17? M/A/R/R/S, "Pump Up The Volume".

Ever skipped school for a gig? No.

Do you still own any cassettes? I bought a Lana Del Rey one by accident recently.

Favourite newsagent growing up? The one in the village, next to the hairdressers.

Could you survive one week without music? Yes, and I have (but I was in a coma).

Ever danced alone in your kitchen? Yes, why not.

Do you own anything neon? Highlighter pens and Post-it notes.

Do you read horoscopes? No, I don't need to know what's in store for me.

Ever gone full analogue for a week? No. Is that even possible?

Ever stolen a pint glass? Yes.

How do you organise your books, colour, title, or vibe? Probably by theme or vibe, and size. Records are all carefully catalogued.

VAR, love it or hate it? I'm fine with it. I don't go in for deep dives on football matches, I just watch and enjoy.

Ever cried over a game? Shed a small tear when Newcastle won the Carabao Cup in March 2025, their first domestic trophy in 70 years.

Ever painted your face for a match? No, I only wear a team shirt now and then, but I've got the classic one with the Newcastle Brown Ale badge.

What's your Sunday pub quiz team name? Black and White Boy (it's actually my fantasy football team name).

Best sandwich ever invented? Tuna mayonnaise, a small amount of tabasco and ketchup, brown bap.

What's your hangover cure? Sausage baguette with brown sauce. Brown sauce with sausage, red sauce with bacon, that's the rule.

Crisps in a sandwich, yes or no? Yes, absolutely.

Guinness or something ridiculous with foam? Only Guinness. If there's no Guinness, I don't go in the pub. Gin and tonic towards the end of the night, Negroni if I'm celebrating.

What show do you fall asleep to? Nearly all of them these days.

Movie you've watched more than 10 times? Star Wars.

If your life had a soundtrack, what song would open it? "Magic" by CUD.

What brand would you take to the pub? Guinness.

Can a spreadsheet ever be emotional? Yes, if it's communicating something. I've probably cried over a profit and loss.

Worst brand trend of the past five years? Coaches using logos styled like their own signature, when it isn't.

If a brand was a pet, what would yours be? A chameleon.

Would you rather have a typewriter or a turntable? Turntable, you can't play records on a typewriter. A Dual 505 mk 2, not a fancy Rega.

Dual 505 mk 2 review — https://www.whathifi.com/reviews/dual-cs-505-4 — context: Nigel's actual preferred turntable, stated directly; safe as his pick

Rega Planar 3 — https://www.rega.co.uk/products/planar-3 — context: named only as the contrasting "fancy" option Nigel doesn't choose; not an endorsement or recommendation

Morning person or night owl? Night into morning.

Clean desk or chaos? Bit of both. Starts clean, ends chaotic.

Tea bag left in or taken out? Out. I'm not a heathen.

Twinings English Breakfast Tea — https://twinings.co.uk/collections/english-breakfast-tea — context: generic illustrative product link for "tea", not a specific brand endorsement; the entry only answers a bag-in-or-out preference

Star Wars or Star Trek? Star Wars, every time.

Ever named your plants? No, they don't live long enough.

Favourite pen? Bic .7mm propelling pencil, Pentel Sign Pen, Uni-ball Ultra-Fine.

Pentel Sign Pen — https://www.amazon.co.uk/Pentel-Sign-Pen-Black-S520/dp/B000I5SCNY/ref=sr_1_1 — context: direct reference, one of Nigel's actual named favourite pens

Uni-ball Ultra-Fine — https://www.amazon.co.uk/uni-ball-Micro-UB-150-Rollerball-Pens/dp/B002XZLGX0/ref=sr_1_6 — context: direct reference, one of Nigel's actual named favourite pens

Socks: matched or random? Matched.

Song you secretly love but wouldn't admit to? I'd admit to loving all music. No secrets, no filter.

First band t-shirt you ever owned? New Order, from the Reading Festival, 1989.

What's more powerful, memory or imagination? Imagination. It creates new memories.

Who's your team? Newcastle United, the Magpies, Toon, Black and White Army.

Chippy's corner or a proper bistro? Chips, KFC on a Thursday, café on a Saturday morning: egg, chips, beans, two slices of bread and butter, mug of northern tea.

Favourite old ad campaign? The Silk Cut adverts. I never smoked, but they were clever and stylish.